What do you really want?
What do you really want? This week’s magic words are about learning to get specific — on both sides of a conversation — and what opens up when you do.
coaching
Say The Thing
Avoiding hard conversations doesn’t make them go away—it just makes them heavier. Here’s how telling the truth can set everything in motion.
The 5 Phases of Doing It Differently
The 5 Phases of Doing it Differently offer a powerful map for personal change. From blissful ignorance to new identity, these stages help you recognize that change takes time—and that even when you’re stuck in a “slow-motion wreck,” you’re making progress. You may bounce between phases for a while, but each one is a vital part of learning to choose something new. This framework can help you shift habits with more clarity, compassion, and patience.
Courage First
When you’re stuck or scared to start, it’s not clarity you’re missing—it’s courage. Real change begins before you feel ready.
Imprint
We all carry imprints—unconscious adaptations from earlier in life that shaped how we respond to the world. Like a tree growing away from shade that’s no longer there, or an elephant who forgets its strength, we often stay loyal to conditions that no longer exist. These imprints aren’t flaws; they were wise responses to the environments we once lived in. But when they go unexamined, they can quietly steer our choices and reactions in ways that no longer serve us. Coaching can help you spot these outdated patterns and choose something new.
Circling
Most of us are walking around starving for real contact. Circling is a simple, radical practice of presence in relationship—one that’s transformed how I listen, connect, and show up in every part of my life.
Make it Bigger
When you’re tangled in strong emotions or inner conflict, sometimes the way through is to make it bigger. This playful-yet-powerful practice has helped me defuse fights, access deeper truth, and move stuck energy—without bypassing the real stuff.
Growth Edge
Naming a direction is kind of like casting a magic spell. It starts to organize reality. From funerals to breakups to everyday dinners, setting intentions has helped me create more meaningful, aligned experiences—and it can do the same for you.
Intention
Naming a direction is kind of like casting a magic spell. It starts to organize reality. From funerals to breakups to everyday dinners, setting intentions has helped me create more meaningful, aligned experiences—and it can do the same for you.
Measure Backwards
If we only look at the road ahead, we’re likely to feel discouraged or overwhelmed. When we measure backwards instead of comparing ourselves to the ideal, we tap into a deeper sense of progress, peace, and motivation.
Survey Says
We often get lost in stories about what we think is happening—with ourselves and with others. That’s why “Survey says” is such a useful tool. Just look at the evidence. What results are you getting?
Speak Inarguably
This idea—speaking inarguably—is one of the most transformative communication tools I’ve ever learned. When we speak inarguably, we come back to the only truth we ever really have: our experience, right now.