“I’ll never make half as much in my consulting business as I used to make working full-time.” —Real sentence I heard from a potential client this week.
Public service announcement, friends: Please do your best not say things like this.
Because here’s the thing:
1. We have no idea what’s possible.
Can any of us really know for sure what’s going to happen in the future? Of course not.
But we often talk like we do—usually with a healthy dose of negativity bias.
Our brains like to fool us into thinking we’re just reporting the news when we say something like the sentence I heard. “Just stating a fact about reality, nothing to question here!” 🥸
But that’s a lie. (Read this post to understand what I mean.)
2. Our words create our reality.
In addition to not being true, sentences like that are dangerous.
Because words are powerful. They shape our world.
There are at least two levels on which you can understand this. Let’s start with the thoroughly science-backed one:
The words we speak shape how we see.
Our language frames our perception.
What we expect to see, we’re more likely to notice.
What we don’t expect, we’re more likely to miss.
That goes for red cars, business opportunities, and even the famous gotcha in this selective attention test. (If you’ve never watched the basketball video, take 1:21 and watch it now.)
So when we say and believe something like “I’ll never make that much as a consultant,” we create a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Because now our brain is blind to any other possibility.
We’ve locked in a soundtrack. And our brain—loyal as ever—starts playing it on repeat.
***
Now for the second, more “out-there” level:
You don’t have to believe this—but I invite you to try it on:
Words (and the intention behind them) don’t just influence your perception. They also shape the universe.
I mean this in the magical, Einsteinian, fully non-rational sense.
From this lens, there’s no real difference between what happens “in your mind” and “out there.”
You are an infinitely powerful creator of your reality.
Your thoughts and beliefs can shape not only what you notice—but what the Cosmic Waitress serves up.
So… why not place a better order?
Why not speak more precisely—so you don’t accidentally lock in the past as your future?
Here’s how that might look:
Instead of:
“I’ll never make as much money as a consultant as I did full-time.”
Try:
- “I’m scared I’ll never make that much.”
- “I don’t yet know how to make that much.”
Or even:
✨ “I look forward to someday making more as a consultant than I did full-time.”
✨ “I’m excited to soon be making more than I ever have.”
See the different worlds those sentences create?
I hear this kind of limiting language a lot when people describe themselves, too.
- “I’m bad at math.”
- “I’m terrible at strategy.”
Try:
- “I’ve found math hard in the past.”
- “Strategy has felt intimidating to me.”
Still honest. But way more space spacious.
Important point: If you catch yourself blurting out a limiting belief, it’s not wrong. There are good reasons our brains do this.
But it’s powerful to notice there’s another option—and to start speaking a different future into being.
Specifically yours,
Rachel
PS – I also see this happen a lot when some declares what kind of person they are. “I’m bad at math” or “I’m terrible at strategy” are limiting. “I’ve found math hard in the past” or “Strategy has felt scary to me” are similar but different; they leave more room for a different future.
PPS – If you’re starting to notice how your words (and thoughts) might be shaping your world—and you’re ready to shift some of the patterns holding you back—I can help. Coaching gives you space to examine your stories and choose the ones that open possibility. If that’s what you’ve been craving, I offer free 1-hour consultations to explore whether we’re a fit. Just hit reply and we’ll find a time.
